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Limited Edition Cassette
Cassette + Digital Album
Limited edition first-press pink cassette tape with hand-printed labels and artwork. Includes two bonus tracks, a free download and assorted handmade stickers, designed by Patcharee Phomsouvannady. Only 30 made. Released through Man in the Planet Records.
Includes unlimited streaming of love bites
via the free Bandcamp app, plus high-quality download in MP3, FLAC and more.
I’ve been unsuccessfully trying to write a love song for a long time. No matter which way I construed it, it seemed forced. At best, they were totally cheesy. At worst, they were vapid and loose. Somewhere in between is where I spent weeks writing american spirit: every song was a selfish reminder of things I had put myself through because I was afraid to let anyone in.
But then I figured it out. I stopped looking so hard and I just let it find me. I did what I never thought I could do: I fell in love. I let someone else become what I previously had claimed to be mine and mine alone. After months of separating myself from everything around me, I decided I wanted to be part of something greater, and soon after, the songs started to form. I became less of a mess and more of a benefit. I figured out how to love myself while I was figuring out how to love another person. I guess it’s like they say: you can’t write about what you haven’t experienced. And after experiencing it firsthand, I couldn’t write about anything else.
Each song on love bites categorizes the emotions synonymous with falling in love: fear, uncertainty, doubt, confusion, beauty, fulfillment, acceptance, etc. The spectrum is horrifying, yet alluring; shaky, yet sturdy; complicated, yet simplifying. And although this album is in no way about sex, I found the significance of the phrase ‘love bites' so fascinating; I discovered that people leave marks on one another, sometimes unknowingly. Even if there aren’t bruises or marks to show, you will feel them. The permanence is something that you only can be grateful for: you are forever being changed by the ones you love just as they are forever changing you, and there is nothing more terrifying than that.
released November 11, 2013
these songs were recorded on the floor of conor's bedroom over the course of multiple autumn weekends, using all our own equipment. he mixed and mastered everything; sang on tracks 1, 4, and 5; played guitar on tracks 1, 3, and 5; played charango on track 2; and played keyboard on track 4. i wrote everything; sang and played guitar on all tracks; and played keyboard on track 1.
all "love bite" samples were taken from skype conversations between us over the summer of 2013. they were recorded on my cell phone when he wasn't paying attention.
special thanks to: maddie, for the constant inspiration; mary, for always being there; my parents, for the constant love and support; conor's parents, for the constant toleration; and yoloman, for (mostly) staying out of the way.
also thanks to: joe, who inspired track 5, patti smith, who inspired track 4, and of course conor, who inspires everything i do.
Track Name: i think we had our first kiss while watching food network
i want to fall asleep in your voice and wake up in your thoughts. i'll let my rib cage split open and i will spill out on the pavement. i can't be found broken if i was never put together to begin with. it bit, i felt it. it left a bruise that i collected under my sundress and i can't keep them hidden. it bit, you explored it. you know i might break your heart but you swear you won't feel it. we have the same marks and the same scars that don't need healing. and i've never said this before and meant it.
Track Name: smoke break
i quit dreaming of dying when i found how you fill my mind. i finally have the courage to tell you you're what i dream about now all the time. today i'm not hiding from anything, you pulled my wrists straight out of my sleeves. today, i'm not afraid of getting old. until i die, i will be yours. i want to memorize each dent in your bones and the marks in your skin i'll never tire of. i'll spend each day learning your shape; i love the way you take up space.
Track Name: love bites
i swear to god that i am happy, but it is a dream sketched out on a canvas in me. and you breathe in life with your passion for stories you tell me when i am sad and don't feel like talking. you're afraid to turn back into who you were and i'm so afraid that you will find someone better than me. you make me into someone that i am scared to be. i've carved circles in my arms, thick and red, for better understanding of words i should have said. i've got notebooks full of love songs that you haven't read. you have lines under your skin that you never let me see and poems etched in your palms. if you forget the words, at least you won't forget what they mean. you make me into someone that i am proud to be.
Track Name: the floor of my messy bedroom reminds me of how i felt before we met
a summer so long that we forgot how to value time: as i'm emptying your veins, you're moving through mine. we will kiss on the mouth to make sure our feelings don't come out: my heart is on your sleeve for all the world to see. you create the silence and i am listening so closely. you are the blood that keeps me from fainting and the arch in my spine that keeps me standing. i will deflate my lungs and abandon words on your floor. there are muscles in my body that i haven't used before. you create the silence and i am listening so closely. when we speak, we leave bruises on each other's bodies.
Track Name: apartment walls
i am no longer a mess. my hair is too long, my clothes are too big, but you could care less. my eyes are too wide, my legs are too thin, but you could care less. all the linings of my stomach that i ruined are filled with butterflies. and every corner of my mind that i savaged thinks about laying next to you all the time and it is the nicest thought to fall asleep to. i am no longer a mess. my lungs are so shaky and my thoughts are never coherent but whenever i sing, you pay attention. i want to love you until i have no more room in my chest to do that. and even then i will use whatever is left to prove that i am trying my best. i am trying and i think you know that.